The Bully Pulpit's first contest!

So I recently became a free agent. At about 8:56 Champaign-time last night, as Chief Illiniwek left the court in Assembly Hall, my enthusiasm for Illini sports left with him.

Will I still root for them? Sure.

Will I still go to games? Yep.

Will I ever be as fanatical as I was when I went to New Orleans to see the Sugar Bowl in 2001 or when I went fetal while watching the waning moments of the National Championship game in 2005? Unfortunately I highly doubt it.

So that leaves me with untapped fanaticism without an outlet. Your mission: Find me a new school to root for! Convince me that your Alma mater or just your favorite college is the one for me.

Things I will consider when picking a winner:

1. Originality of the mascot. The Bulldogs, Wildcats, Tigers and Eagles of the world aren't disqualified, but they are definitely behind the eight-ball. You'll have to explain why your Tigers are so much better than the other Tigers in your conference (Yes, LSU I'm talking to you).

2. Though I really like native American nicknames, there must be an active tribe receiving payouts from the university as to assure they won't get Illini-ed like my true Alma mater just did. I really can't take that again. I call this the Florida State Factor. Coversely your school cannot have gotten rid of a Native American mascot in the recent past. I'm talking to the Stanfords, the Miami of Ohios, the SE Missouri States of the world.

3. Recent athletic success. I have enough losers in my personal stable (IE. the Cubs)so if I'm going to pick a new team, they should be a winner. Football success trumps basketball success. Recent success in both would be awesome! Hear me, Florida?

4. School colors. I don't want to own another f'ing orange shirt...and I'm not all that crazy about purple. Nobody looks good in purple.

5. Though small schools are not disqualified, it would be nice to have a school that I can watch a game on TV now and then. Bigger schools have the inside track.

6. The college cannot have "Notre" or "Dame" in their name.

7. Heated rivalries are a plus. Then I not only get a new school to root for, I get a new school to hate! Heated rivalries with cool names are even better (Red River Shootout, The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party).

8. Unique traditions.

9. Cool logos that look good on hats.

10. Any other factors that my fickle ass decides on (I have a problem with their basketball uniforms, Vanilla Ice once wore a shirt from that school in a video, etc).

So take a stab at it! Post your reasons here on my blog and I will pick a winner. Deadline for entries is Midnight CST, March 19th...and I'll announce a winner by April 1st.

Once a winner is anounced, I'll buy some gear from my new school, take a picture and post it on this site.

What's in it for you? Well the first time I attend a game at my new school, I'll buy you a beer and you can have your pick from my extensive collection of orange t-shirts.

Good luck and GO(insert your school here)!!!!

So I'm thinking of getting shirts made...

...'cause I seriously have no idea what an Illini is anymore.

On the bright side of things, I never have to wear orange shirts again. I REALLY hated wearing orange shirts.

I may have spoken too soon.

Yesterday I said my life was complete. I was a smidge premature.



Lookie! My first banning from a internet chat board! Not exactly sure what I did, but I'm sure it was quite, quite heinous...and probably had something to do with Chief Illiniwek. Now it can never be said that I've never made a sacrifice for my beliefs. My mother would be proud.....if she had the slightest idea what an internet chatboard was....which she most certainly does not.

Well,I guess I now know what I'm giving up for Lent.

NOW, my life is complete....plus now I have kind of that "bad boy" vibe that chicks dig so much!

The Chief speaks...and speaks well.

Well, tonights game versus Michigan is the final dance of Chief Illiniwek. In this article from SI on Campus, the current Chief, Dan Maloney, states his feelings on the matter.

The Chief.

He also sums up my feelings much better than I ever could of. From this day on my relationship with the University changes, and it has yet to be seen how. I can not imagine it will be for the better. It was probably time for me to move on anyways.

My life is complete...

A Michigan grad who has little knowledge of the Chief situaton and NO emotional stake in it (but has a more bully pulpit than mine) called me "Sad" and "Small". It doesn't get much better than this!

I actually disagree with you on point #4.
If I gave money to a charity, and that charity suddenly made moves that no longer reflected my values or beliefs, I would not continue blindly donating money to that charity.
The University no longer reflects my values and I do not support that. There are plenty of other outlets that can better use my money.
Trust me, being a huge research university, me taking the University license plates off my car and not returning the yearly request for donations isn't going to cause the Illini Union to come crashing to the ground. It will be an impotent gesture, but I will feel better and my money will go to better causes.
And as a Michigan grad, you have no first hand knowledge the emotions that run here. Because this was handled so poorly by the university, we will be hearing about it for years to come. Trust me.

ZORN REPLY -- Oh, come on. Your value system is so tied up in this sports ritual that you are now rejecting the University for making this decision after many years of wrestling with it? You think this makes up a fraction of a percent of what this University means, what it stands for, what it does, why it's important? That's so sad and so small.

Eric Zorn of The Chicago Tribune

Things That Never Fail to Make Brad Smile: Volume #1

It's an oldie but a goodie. Enjoy the stove solo.

Brad's Rainy Day Happy Fun Club!!!

Today's activity is a Law&Order coloring book courtesy of http://www.brandonbird.com/lno_color.html.

Be sure to color Det. Lenny Briscoe as jaded and cynical as you possibly can!!!

Honor. Loyalty. Tradition.

1926-2007

Only the Chicago Cubs could disappoint me BEFORE the season starts

Well about this time last year, we Cub fans got this thrown at us. Many of us were not pleased.

Not to be outdone for 2007, the Cubs let loose the news that we can expect something along the lines of this for the upcoming season:

(Artist Conception)

I'd be upset, but obviously the Cubs are using the money they are making from selling Wrigley Field piece by piece to advertisers in order to field a high quality product. (You should now be detecting a subtle hint of sarcasm)

By the way, single game tickets go on sale next Friday, February 23rd. Don't even get me started on the fact that bleacher tickets for Prime Dates have gone up to $42 a pop.....by the way over HALF of this year's home games have been deemed "Prime Dates" (46 0f 81).

Next year is here!!!

On this most special of days....

For this and other less mushy statements of love, visit http://www.meish.org/vd.

I could really use a beer.

I enjoy Natalie Dee.

Maybe you will, too.

Natalie Dee

Give it a try.

Brad's signs of the apocalypse for February 12, 2007

Sign #1: The Black Eyed Peas won a Grammy for Pop Performance by a Duo or Group With Vocal for their lyrical friggin' masterpiece "My Humps".

Now I have nothing against the Peas. I own some of their music (mind you I didn't pay good American currency for it). I find it catchy and entertaining. Overall, I kind of like 'em....even when they pee themselves.

But these are Grammy winning lyrics?

"What you gon? do with all that junk? All that junk inside that trunk? I?ma get, get, get, get, you drunk, Get you love drunk off my hump. What u gon? do with all that ass? All that ass inside them jeans? I?m a make, make, make, make you scream Make u scream, make you scream. Cos of my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump. My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely lady lumps."

....and that's just the chorus!!!

Wow. I would understand the People's Choice awards or even the American Music Awards, but I actually thought that the Grammys were...I don't know....respectable? I stand corrected.

Sign #2: The Eddie Murphy movie "Norbit" was #1 at the box office and made $33.7 million.

Remember when Eddie Murphy was cutting edge, provocative and funny? I bet you that if he was given a chance, that Eddie Murphy would kick this Eddie Murphy's ass.

Hopefully he won't be nominated for an Oscar for this role as well.

Life at 5 mph.

So it took me over an hour and a half to get home tonight.

Traffic is teh suck....and it's teh double suck on Friday night.

Thing is I love living in the city.

Unfortunately, I love my job..... that just as unfortunately happens to be out in the 'burbs.

Something may have to give.

I'm going to go out and have a few beers now. I think I've earned them.

Heck you have one, too. You deserve it.

For all my Chicago peeps..

Barrack Obama is speaking at a rally at UIC on Sunday afternoon at 3:30. Details and ticket locations are here (http://www.barackobama.com/tour/illinois/chicago/index.php) .

My new winter coat....

Okay...so I've already complained about the cold once this week....and normally I'd let it go by now....but this is re-goddamn-diculous! It hasn't been above 20 degrees since last Thursday. I'm actually getting kind of used to just always being cold. I think what is really bothering me is the fact since it has been so cold, I have not strapped on my running shoes since last Thursday night. Running has been keeping me sane for the past few months now and I was just really getting into the sickness when this cold snap hit. Heck, it's gotten to the point where I've been saying to myself that "It's 18 out but that's pretty close to 20 (my cut off point)!". Now that's sick.

I'm to the point where I may break down soon and hit a treadmill...as much as I detest them. Bah.

By popular demand: Tiki the Tank's lost frat weekend recap

Well my nephew invited me downstate for Father-Son Weekend at his fraternity. The following is a high level recap of the festivities. Names have been changed to protect the innocent:

Start off with beer at frat house.

Watch nephews roommate fill a glass 3/4 full of jager and then top it off with a splash of red bull. I'm a little afraid now.

Beer, wings and cheese fries at bar. Lite Drafts = $1.75

Kegs of Beer at house across from frat house called "The Hive".

B-ball game.

Back to "The Hive". More beer. Much more beer.

Convinced a dude named "Diesel", who THINKS he rammed his head into a wall the night before causing the large marks on his face , that he should run for President one day.

Nephew starts introducing me to every girl he can find with big boobs.

Diesel start campaigning by shaking the hand of everyone walking into the party, "Vote for me for president, but not now....when I'm 35." I'm proud I can inspire the nations youth.

Tell a kid how much I love his Kyle Orton jersey and offer to buy it. I call him Neckbeard the rest of the night.

*big boobied blonde* "Your Uncle Brad is cute and so funny! How old is he?"
*Nephew* Age doesn't matter.
That's my boy!

Kegs run out.

Sober pledge drives me, my brother-in-law and nephew to bar in d'town Blormal. Nearly plotz that I order three Lite drafts and get over $6 in change on a $10.

More beer, jager bombs, soco and lime

Girl starts making dirty faces at me. So I start making Brad faces at her. She comes over and explains that she's really making them at a guy standing behind me wearing Cardinals hat and compliments me on my Bears hat. We talk. She goes back to her killjoy roommate at the table who is pouting. She comes back in 15 minutes and hands me a beer and apologizes that she has to leave because of her roommate being too cold.

More Beer. More shots. Bar closes, sober pledge drives us back to frat.

"UNCLE BRAD!"

Jager guy puking in nephews room. Join party playing asshole in other room. Drink much more beer with group of people I don't know.

*blurry girl* "You're so funny, when are you coming back down?"

Brother-in-law falls asleep at urinal standing up. Boys tried to wake him up. "Mr. So-and-so, Mr. So-and-so, wake up!...... Aw fuck it, go get a camera!" Unfortunately he woke up and shook it off before we got the camera.

I head down to kitchen and talk to girls with my younger nephew. Watch my older nephew drop a whole pizza on the floor. He still ate the crust.

Crawl into unoccupied bed up in common sleeping area at 4ish. Was one of last few standing. I was proud of me.

Wake up at 11 the next morning.. Come down stairs.

*group* "UNCLE BRAD, YOU CASANOVA!"

"Uncle Brad, I hear you were hitting on my girl!"
"Could you be more specific? I remember talking to a lot of girls."

I open a can of Keystone Light.

You'll freeze to death before you reach the first marker!

So it's cold in Chicago.........I know "water is wet, the sky is blue" but c'mon this is just silly. It is 1 degree Fahrenheit right now. (BTW, I'm all about going to the metric system for the mere fact that I have never been able to spell Fahrenheit. Celsius is SOOOO much easier to spell.)

Did I mention that it is 1?

1.

...and it's snowing like crazy. It is not supposed to snow when it is 1. Those are the rules. No snowing when it is 1. Obviously, those rules no longer apply. Dagnabit.

I haven't even been running since last Thursday because it's just too damn cold. When I ran Thursday night it was a balmy 20 degrees out. Now I can only hope for it to get that warm again. Yes, I'm hoping that it will get above 20. That's pretty pathetisad. Hell, I'll prolly be sweating my butt off when I run when we hit the 30's.

Yesterday was so cold, I just didn't leave the apartment at all let alone go for a run. Tikitten and I slept a lot and it was glorious.

All in all, I feel the blame lies with my friends and family. If they didn't all live up here, I'd still be living in Savannah, where it is a balmy 50 degrees right now. When I come down with the hypothermia and lose three toes to frostbite, they are all gonna feel SOOOOOO guilty, and rightfully so.

I kind of feel bad for them a little...but then I start to lose the feeling in my extremities....

So the Bears lost in the Super Bowl.

On the bright side of things, the Cubs home opener is April 9th.

....and I'm sure they won't disappoint me.

So I have a crush on Kristin Chenoweth....

...and I don't care who knows it!!! *Brad spins and throws hat in the air*

It's alive.

So after listeners of Radiotiki (http://www.newbreedsystems.com/tikipedia/index.php/Brad) noticed my initial blog had a short and uneventful life, I have decided to give it another go. Since Radiotiki (www.radiotiki.com) is going on hiatus soon until Tommy gets settled in England, I may need a new creative outlet....and heck I'm sure the listeners would like to keep tabs on what B-List Brad has been doing with his spare time ("Really, he went out drinking beer again? NO WAY!")

So heck, let's give it another try. Please let me do enough interesting things in my life to make this worthwhile....

As a gift for being so patient with me, my gift for you is a picture of Oskee the Tikitten.


He's awesometastic!

...and yes, I still love gormet sub day and working from home. Some things never change.